Kindfulness
Photo by Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash
Kindfulness
“It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood.” ~ Fred Rogers
“Breathing in, I arrive. Breathing out, I smile.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh
The reminders are simple, their message profound.
This moment is miraculous. This day is beautiful.
Is that how life really feels on any given day? Or does it feel like the windshield of your life is distorted with splatter, bug juice, grime, a film you didn’t even notice building up until you’re driving east into the rising sun?
The beauty of our life is always there, the present moment is reliable in that way
Sometimes we’re just not seeing clearly, not because we don’t want to or can’t but because until we use a good degreaser to clean the lens we’re looking through our view will continue to be filtered through the grime.
Kindfulness
There’s a word I love - kindfulness. Coined by Ajahn Brahm.
It’s a contraction of Mindfulness + Kindness = Awareness with heart.
Kindfulness is like a great bird with two strong, balanced wings. The first wing is Mindfulness.
This is awareness, the ability to be with what is, as it is, without immediately trying to fix, change, or escape it. It is noticing the: tightness in your chest when challenges appear, swirl of thoughts moving through the mind like weather patterns, emotional tone or as I like to say flavor, running in the background
(Reread the “Resting in the Hammock of Awareness” blog post as a refresher.)
The second wing is Compassion, a place where our common humanity takes root. Compassion is the capacity to meet our experience with tenderness, especially the experiences that are challenging and uncomfortable.
Compassion applied toward oneself says: “This is hard and I’m here for me.” It has the quality of a mother holding a hurting child, kissing their boo-boo, not to make the pain disappear, but because the pain is here waiting to be acknowledged.
If mindfulness is present without compassion, we can become harsh. Aware of everything and critical of it all. “If I were more mindful, I wouldn’t feel this way.” On the other hand, compassion without mindfulness can spill into self-pity, critical narratives, and emotional wallowing.
Mindfulness sees clearly, “This is here now.” Compassion responds: “I can meet it with kindness.”
These two wings balanced and working together become the degreaser needed to clear the bug juice and grime of our windshield. The beautiful day and miraculous moment come back into view.
Today, notice: Which wing do I tend to rely on Mindfulness or Compassion?
What might happen if I practiced Inviting the other in.
Life IS messy and imperfect and it is also beautiful and miraculous.
Wishing you a kindfulness day. It’s beautiful and miraculous right where you are standing.
In-joy kindfulness,
Debbie