You Are What You Think – Where to Go From There

Photo by Markus Winkler on Unsplash

In the world of mindfulness teaching, there’s a simple adage: Teach what is most alive in you.

Right now, what’s most alive in me… is thinking. Not just what we think, but how often we don’t even realize we’re thinking at all.

Let’s start with a familiar phrase: “You are what you eat.”

• Junk food? Sluggish, inflamed, depleted body.

• Nourishing food? Stronger, more resilient system.

We understand this when it comes to the body, even if we don’t always practice it.

But when it comes to the mind do we even consider the idea that we are what we think?

We often forget that we are consuming mental food all day long.  And depending on what we mentally consume it can change the way we feel from sluggish and depleted to strong and resilient.

The Mind Is Not Fixed, It’s Malleable

Modern neuroscience provides us with a powerful truth: The brain is not fixed, it’s changeable. Adaptable. Shapeable. Through the lens of neuroplasticity, the brain is a bit like playdoh – soft, moldable, responsive to how we use it.

But there is a catch.  It only changes when we actually “put our hands on it.” Meaning… when we pay attention. Paying attention in particular to:

• what we are feeding it

• what we are focusing on

• what thoughts we are rehearsing, again and again

• what assumptions and perspectives are quietly running in the background

Because whether we realize it or not, what we mentally practice gets stronger. Do you know what you want to mentally strengthen?

The Water We’re Swimming In

Here’s something to consider: Most of our thinking is so close to us, we can’t see it.

You can’t see your own nose unless you intentionally shift your focus or place a mirror in front of you.

Just as fish don’t recognize the water they’re swimming in we often don’t recognize the mental environment we’re living inside of.

There is constant commentary of assumptions, judgments and subtle narratives running just beneath the surface of our awareness.

So, Who’s Driving?

I invite you to playfully consider something:  If your life were a bus, taking you on multiple journeys over the years, who or what is driving the bus of your life?

Is it conscious awareness or, to use a Buddhist phrase, is it “monkey mind”?  The monkey in your mind is chattering away deploying well-worn thought patterns, old habits, unquestioned beliefs, judgments, fear mongering, critical self-narratives, creating constant distractions and more.

Important questions are - is this monkey mind taking you where you actually want to go? Do you know where you want to go?

The Real Purpose of Mindfulness

There’s a common misperception about the practice of mindfulness. People often think the goal is to feel better, more calm, clear and at ease.  And yes, sometimes all that can happen.

But the deeper truth is that the purpose of mindfulness practice is to understand the nature of your own mind.  To see clearly what’s happening in your internal environment, how it’s happening(with intention or by default) and the impact it’s having on you and that which you come in contact with.

Because once you can look and see you’re no longer being run by the monkey, you become intentional.

From Automatic to Aware

This understanding is where life becomes both freeing and a little uncomfortable.

As our awareness grows, so does our responsibility. We begin to see how we interpret events, how we jump to conclusions quickly creating meaning, and how we reinforce well-worn mental loops. And then we realize maybe it’s time to become our own bus driver, like the well-known children’s song advises, invite the monkey to “move on back, move on back.”

We may not be able to control everything life brings our way but with our hands on the steering wheel of our life we can choose how we meet life stuff.

A Gentle Invitation

Before trying to fix, change, or improve anything…

Pause. Notice.

• What am I paying attention to right now?

• What thoughts keep repeating?

• What am I reinforcing without even realizing it?

No judgment. No need to change anything yet. Just a small shift, from being inside the thought to seeing the thought. That’s where transformation begins.

PRACTICE: A Moment of Observing

Sometime today, pause for just a minute. No need to sit in a special position or carve out a perfect moment. Just pause – wherever you are. Gently ask yourself:

• What’s in my mind right now?

• What thought is repeating, lingering or looping?

Don’t try to change it. Don’t analyze it. Just notice. Then see if you can take one small step back and say quietly to yourself: “Ah, thinking is happening.” Not my thinking or good/bad thinking, just thinking.

Then notice:

• Does anything soften, even slightly?

• Is there just a bit more space in mind and/or body?

That space, that moment of seeing rather than being pulled in, that’s the beginning of awareness. And from awareness you have choices and agency.

In-joy the noticing.

Debbie